im in Kalimpong currently catching up with an old friend. so ive made it safely to india… quite a few emotional bumps in the road. tears of joy. tears of pain. tears of sweat stinging my eyes while climbing over 4000 ft “hills”. sadly to say my camera is down for the moment. i hope to replace it in darjeeling next week sometime. miss you all.-jrizzaux
very tired… yet still encouraged to do the distance. riding through a sketchy state today… so if you could send a little heart mojo my way.. i would be greatly appreciative. anyways love you all.
I ran into a two year old playing in the street with my newly decked out cycle. I couldn’t brake fast enough and the next thing I knew was this little girl face was down under my bike frame. A deliberating crowd came out and swallowed me in the language I’ve been studying and all I could make out was… You can go. She’s ok. Without catching my breath I asked for forgiveness to find I was the only one left standing there. With a bloody hand and scraped knee and my sweet tricked out mountain bike I went to lunch a little later than usual.
The deep slumber awakening in simplicity. A beautiful day. Not all went as planned but change always brings along surprise. Pealing potatoes to metal for an afternoon meditation. Excercise and errands by cycle. Feast preparation for the unsung guests and one fellow traveller. Feeding fire to cook food and warm limbs under the consuming reflection of the full moon. Juggling thoughts, hopes, visions inbetween morsels of chicken curry and smoked root vegetables. A panoramic canine howl announced the coming of the new year. The embers continued to wind down our philosophic transactions until the the utensils found the way back to their places of slumber. (gaining strength in the darkness to fully embark into the morning light of the new decade)
It has been a wild December on the way up to now. I have crossed the valley of Nepal to the City of Pokhora in a two day journey by cycle. It was grueling and yet non stop beauty. I got a little lost…go figure… but thankfully i learned to read and followed the buses that said pokhora! (the maps that i shot with my digital camera were blurry in the area that i was turned around… gotta love fog) Ive been staying at James Hetheringtons hotel and making a painting for the foyer in trade. The Nepali staff feel like family. I have eaten at many of their homes and am constantly making jokes… mainly about misunderstandings and cultural slips. A few days ago I went for a bike ride with a new friend at the local bike shop that turned into an all day event to the top of a mountain and to his village to meet his father for cheeya. on the way back I ate some river fish whole and tried not to choke on the bones. also had a nice spill over the handlebars near a cliff edge… looked cooler than it felt.. im sure. Rex and Susan just arrived with their church group… and it is so good to see some familiar faces… though i feel much more comfortable with the nepalis than most of the folk from Olathe. I will try to con them into carrying a few letters back.. or topis or coffee or whatever i can. An Indian group of christian med students met last week in the afternoon to sing carols together(and have pizza)and as we were singing silent night i was transported to the dark snowcovered fountains in the plaza with the lights flashing in the periphery. beautiful. I went to Parmelas house for dinner a few days ago and was served fish curry and daal bhat… only i received the head!… as well as a pink nepali scarf for the cold. I have been given a great treasure to visit this place and these people.
Merry Christmas. im like a child scrambling with anticipation stirring for a celebration. ..Jesus was born to bring good news of forgiveness and redemptive new lives for the oppressed and those oppressing… breaking the human cycle of despair and hopelessness. may we sing and shout with great joy in view of his mercy and love.
Living light in the darkness, color in the dullness, salt in the tastelessness… forming the shapeless endless kingdom coming into being.
My thanksgiving started out with a personality test(that I had never taken!)…where I found my behavioral balance between being dramatic, vigilant, and ideosyncratic. Took a motor cycle ride to the other John’s flat… For a wonderful birthday party/thanksgiving feast among old,new, and brand new friends. (nerd alert)Afterwards we played settlers of catan with 7people on two games and half of a homemade expansion. I was able to build one road and buy 16 development cards. Haha. On a complete other note.… I am watching my friend ellens house and so have some space to myself. Though I do miss my family that I was staying with, I can come and go as I please. My cross country journey is coming up quick so it’s good to get some rest without allergy problems.
this last week I rode to the nagarkot tower/stupa to see the langtang range of the Himalayas. (everest being ever so faint in the distance… But present) my day started at 5 am and due to the real world not distinguishing between a yellow road and a red one like my map does, I found myself on a dirt trail on the side of a mountain until nearly 11. When I got to the tower there was a shuddering commotion as I had scared what seemed to be 50 golden eagles from thier mountain top perches. Not to mention the 180degree stare of the whitecapped langtangs. My descent took about an hour and a half. Bone crunching is what we called it on the pct. 25kilomtrs of rocky jostling dirt inhalation. My smile was nearly touching my ears though my butt and forearms where screaming profanities.
Yesterday was my two month mark. I went to the embassy with my friend Robert and on the way back a motorcycle hit my bike at a grinding hault at a stoplight. Scuff of the tires kind of thing. Shock meeting heartstopping smiles. Needless to say this is what life feels like in Nepal. There is danger all around and often close and so my senses are heightened. My awarness of myself and my contxt are constantly being sharpened. Then there is the deep soaking rest that comes after you’ve given your everything to the day and survived to tell the story. It’s good. Difficult and often heartwrenching but good.
My love grows so much in distance. I pray these words find you in good health and spirit as the earths angle makes a shorter day and colder season. Haha. Yours truly, johnraux.
We all turn corners with expectations and presuppositions of what lies on the other side and how it should be… And now that Ive made the big turn and have been strolling for a while I find myself rehashing the faint whispers of reason,feeing,& will to… Go and see. It’s really similar to my love of bad movies that was almost twarted by the judgmental critic built by art school. Forgetting the trailors,refusing the advice of aficionados, and just letting the film stir my senses. In the same light…I’m starting to see Kathmandu. And reMembering who I am along the way. I’ll be biking 200kilometers to pokora in 2 weeks to get out of the valley for a bit. I’m very excited for the next turn that I’m currently being stretched for… Who knows what it may hold?
ive been off and on sick the last few weeks..due to the cold weather…according to the nepalis. my feet have actually gone into the always cold phase… owell. met a wonderful group of internationals(non nepali) that live close to me. in two weeks ive gone from daal bhat everyday to pizza and tandoori chicken… they say theyve ruined me… i feel like ive been given a breather. I finished lost highway(about Shangri la)… and realized that im here. not the Himalayas but the life im already living. the kingdom inside of me..inside of you. sensational rollercoaster of chaos and order. gift and garbage. the paradox of growing older while becoming younger. Im sure that I will do many more things to laugh at my foolish ways in hindsight but choosing to follow my heart will always bring me back to the joy I already know. the christ already risen. the creative poetry of all creation. my relationships that mean more than the world to me.. they are the world and I am but a traveler on a voyage.… watching, listening, learning, playing, risking the trial version will work long enough for me to express something simply with what Ive been given. a song of gratitude where the main melody is charity expressed through love.
so.… the morning to end all mornings… i decided to just scope out the region around the base of the mountain instead of climbing to the top.. the early morning bike ride through a few new villages and around “new” to me ..stupas was increadible.. fog around the river for dramatic effect.. that eventually disoriented me a little when the mountain was fully hidden. after hopping a stream, I met an old man who was inviting me to his house( i thought for cheeya) but after the very steep trails to his place I found my self frozen at this 65yearish man with a cane offering me the most outlandish amount of pot. after a complicated charades game we took a very confusing route back to the road(to cover his tracks) and met a younger man who spoke a little english (and was very interested in my bike) he llead me to the local cheeya shop and then continued to lead me… asking if i could help him…? or was he saying that he was helping me back… for a fee.. or for my bike… i had a very bad vibe so i started a second charades routine to part ways. following a new route i was faced with a rowdy bus full of communist flag wavers and was not so sure waht to do.. so i started pumping my fist in the air and yelling and they let me pass… i ended up finding a beautiful gorge and ancient bridge to take a rest after a wild excursion…all before 9 in the morning.
in the months following i will travel west to Joppa where the Butanese refugee camps are located.. Darjeeling to my host Saroj’s village. to Lumbini to study tanka(buddist scroll painting), to u.p., mossouri, ladock,varinassi, kolkutta, Pokora and the Tibetan camps to the north.etc. etc. etc. I am currently searching for a brave soul… who speaks nepali or hindi or both fluently to accompany me. so far there are a few short term pilgrims in for a leg.. or a week..or a bike ride… and that is a start.
So I just found out my Grandma-in-Law passed away. Ruth had bright red hair. She was a fire starter. Had an opinion about everything. She bought me my first pocket knife at a brookeside garage sale(i dont think my mother ever found out). she loved watching all the cousins romp around during thanksgiving and christmas chaos. There was always coke, sprite, and chocolate something in close proximity(not to mention some kind of grand meal plan). She was stubborn about asking for help(like all grownups) and was a blessing that oftentimes slowed down the family commotion. My cousin Kristin told me the day before she passed..she was at the salon.. getting her hair done. she was a gem, and i will keep her with me (and you too)as my journey continues.
I feel like I am making great strides with the language. I have many Nepali friends that all seem to love helping me study(not to mention laugh at my pronunciation) I try to go into “the jungle” or “the villages” every other day on my bike. My butt is really sore from the authentic offroad feel of the roads and paths here. Right now Im just meeting people and eating at different peoples homes. Thes helps me learn culture and its just really good to sit down with smiling people. Ive also met a handful of wonderful people from the states.Robert nd Megan and thier little bruiser Titus are my very near nieghbors who i bother with my philisophical and theological rants and rabbit trails .…while we all work to learn and adapt in this wild place in the middle of the Himalayas.
Im journalling everyday with silly mundane details to remember my time hear…mapping the journey. here are a few randm days from this past 3 weeks.
Oct 6 day3.
tossed my dal this morning. I think Im eating the rice too fast. not sure. I was able to eat the rest of “brunch” after my hurling experience. Met Dukpa, Saroj’s brother in law(at least he calls him that) and went to a recording studio to meet his band. shared a little james dean trio and mike crawford with Chetn the engineer. went to Dukpas house, ate biriani, watched a pirated jack black film with hindi subtitles. on the way home had samosas and takari at jawalakhel. learned how to make aloo parathas when i returned home. Getting into the pre dawn rhythem of yoga, prayer, reading, language study, journaling, and cheeya before little brother (Targan) wakes up.
Oct 17 d 14
woke up (in a storage room for carpets in Boudha) and did a watercolor of the drying carpets. found my way up to arubari via general instructions over a muted phone. toured Heather adn Maika’s house and had Coffee!! and Pasta!!!(with cheese and chicke) told the kids stories from the PCT. Met all the pets(over 10) had a chaotic singing time with the kids leading the songs followed by a very wonderful and encouraging discussion with Heather adn Maika about relationships, transitions, and community. watched dragon ballZ with the kids(so funny to see the kids bust out when an american actor says Namaste). walked down to the ring road. met a college kid who helped me onto the wrong bus.. on that bus another man figured out where i was heading and got me off the bus and onto another. when they found out where i was going i was just pushed off of the bus… luckly i had done some exporing in my nieghborhood and after a surreal few minuites of being really lost in a foreign city in the middle of the night i found my way home. It felt so good to walk in that door. dalbaht with a small glass of coke. early to beed.
Oct 21 day 17
Went over to Robert and Megans and played with Titus while meagan talked to a friend online. Took a HOT SHOWER! what a joy adn blessing. went exploring to find the german bakery and the bike shop. bought a sweet trail map around the city to broaden my wanderng range. walked to Durbar Square in Patan… looking for a scarf… and ended up painting the old city with street kids conversing and watching all around me. went to chetn’s studio and listened to more of Dukpa’s songs. Went to the momo cart..had momos adn got cheeya for Targan. went home and when the power went out( as it usually does in the evening) i listened to HeartattackTime Machine while watching the motorcycle and taxi lights create a wonderful abstract shadow effect on the cieling. made roti and when Targan returned… of coarse more momos!
Oct 27 day 23
went for a walk with Nabin around his neighborhood. realized one of the men I met the first day at the wedding was the owner of top of the world coffee(which Dan had an email contact and Robin read an artical about before I left) walked by his house. sat and watched some kids to tai kwon do. bought peanut butter and and baking powder for Megan’s banana pancakes. Had cheeya and egg sanwiches with the family. rode up to arubari exploring northern kathmandu. set up the slackline for the kids to walk… my arms got very tired after helping the 10th kid across. watched a documentary on Ladock with Maika.. did my first night ride home. crazy. and awesome.
a few more things.
electricity– Ive recently found out there is a “rough” schedule to the power outages… which most
the time is about 2 hours during the evening and 4 at max. my headlamp is now shared by my family, the family next door, and targan when hes out late with the momo cart. other than that we have an oldfashioned oil lamp and my cell phone has a dandy flashlight on the end of it. woohoo light.
internet– currently i am uploading more photos and videos and the blazing speed of 13.6 kb per second! flash… and im at a westerners home on their computer… the windows2000 machines at my cyber cafe sometimes move that quick.
“when the water comes” –people have as much water as their “system”(buckets and one pump) can hold when water flows through each particular nieghborhood. so for me.. during the day we have the buckets we’ve filled up to last until 6ish when the spicket works again. some people have hot water… which means there are pipes on the roof painted black for the sun to heat as it flows down…meaning the longer the water runs the hotter it gets.
atms– some of these self proclaimed money exchangers give you access to your bank and some of these give your bank account access to the man behind the curtain.
kilos– im actually gaining weight with all of the rice and momos that im being fed… and i eat maybe a third less than apoo.
sweets– i dont know what it is… but the sugar in all the cheeya reminds me of frosted flakes.
Kathmandu consumerism– i cracked and starting buying things. a mask for the smog with awesome flames on it. the prementioned cell phone. “a cross coantry” mountain bike. and a sweet –10C sleeping bag… all have proven to be pretty handy so far.
morning ritual– hackjob yoga tai chi 8th grade gym class. prayer/meditation. journaling. ipod time with mike crawford, chris crisci, don and laurie chaffer. cheeya. walk or bike someplace new… or wait for the family to wake up.
Ill put up some of my journal entries and more photos this next week.
synchronicity, what Nepalis call fire in the ears, seems to be all around me. So I bowed out of playing with the band for a “crusade”. a very difficult cultural situation to get out of(and odd scenario to be talked into).. but Saroj helped me to not offend any of the christians in the neighborhood… though having cheeya(chai/tea) with a mobster, police officer, and buddhist hipster certainly wasnt helping my image. owell. Instead of band practice i went on a walk to my friend Chetns recording studio(two rooms, a computer, and mixing board) He wasnt around..so i found myself in a part of town i havent explored..and in my wandering i happened to run into Heather and Maika… friends of friends that ive contacted through email and made plans to connect with eventually..(and they live an hour away)… and here we are meeting on the street..randomly. they helped me get a cell phone and find an atm that actually works. there will be many stories to come about their 12 animals and 10 kids. how could there not be with a line up like that. all in all life is really good. simple. lots of walking. lots of food and hospitality. my Nepali is improving. my manic semantic ways continue… next stop.. the bike shop and how to brave the insanity of Kathmandu traffic. wooha. love and miss you all.-jraux
a few things…http://www.vimeo.com/7093396.
Momos. water buffalo dumplings with a chili sauce that my wonderful hosts sell on a cart down on the main road.
.Bunu. my 5 year old language tutor. mostly we sing and tickle but sometimes it turns into hurt feelings.
. Patan. south of Kathmandu where im staying with Pastor Saroj and the Chetri family. Its basicly the place where the city falls off into rice fields.
. Nose ring. I always know when the locals are talking about me because of the signature way that they wiggle there noses. (Tamang women often have the same piercing)
.toilet. well theres a hole in the floor. buckets of water all around. you figure it out.
.watercolor. everyone wants to see what jn roe the tall white man with the “shake your nose” is doing. this is often the start of my “discussions”(basicly learning names..beyond that my Nepali breaks down)
.spirit. everyday is a new day. never know what is instore, who i will meet, what i will be doing. many where masks due to the polution. the open endedness of the culture is like breathing fresh air.
. eucharist. cheeya and biscuits with everyone i meet. we are all human and meet across the table for food and the warm life that sips sweet ginger and new relationship.
i just wanted to make a quick note to tell everyone that i have made it safely to nepal. i will be making regular posts as soon as i get somewhat settled. love you all.
–jraux
In the status update box on Facebook reads “whats on your mind”. So I committed to speaking my mind for the few months I had left before my travel to Asia. These are the posts that came out during that period.
John Raux thinks more monks should be ninjas(or at least know kung fu). contemplative and physical health flourish when pushed to rigorous ends. the great challenge to make peace without murder is exemplified by creativity, physical activity and prayer…. min us the throwing stars. save those for the renn fest.
Plan like the wind, commit like an animal, connect like a tree, vow like a mountain,love like the ocean tide… swelling by the gravity of another.
waiting
turning corners
flowing ranges that were previously impossible( improbable)
excusable reasons of disorienting relational diaspora.
What kind of world is in me when I numbly do what I mostly am attempting to stand against?
How to change my focus to what I am to stand for
letting the slips slide and the glories climb
that my whole may be sanctified to heal the lives and sight of those caught in the similar self drifting darkness.
be my friend.
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